Prepare for a good laugh with these apple jokes! These hilarious puns and playful humor revolve around everyone’s favorite fruit.
From quick one-liners to funny stories, these jokes are sure to bring joy to people of all ages.
Apple One-Liner Jokes
1. Why did the apple go to therapy? It couldn’t get to its core issues.
2. Never trust an apple, they can be quite rotten to the core.
3. I told my apple to stop being so sweet, but it’s hard to tart a conversation.
4. I dropped my apple today, guess it’s in cider trading now.
5.The apple didn’t roll far from the tree, it just took a shortcut.
6. What’s an apple’s favorite social media? Vine!
7. Why do apples lie all the time? They can’t help but be de-cider-ful.
8. I always peel my apples because you can’t trust a food that wears a jacket.
9. Apple turnover: a dessert or a fruit exercise routine?
10. The apple didn’t fall far from the tree; it was just taking root.
11. That apple is so hilarious, it always cracks me up – just like an egg.
12. An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but it certainly keeps the dentist busy.
13. Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
14. Don’t mess with an apple, they know how to bruise.
15. Apples are always red and ready, just like the stop sign.
16. I met a time-traveling apple yesterday, it was quite ahead of its peel.
17. That apple sure has a zest for life.
18. Never get into a fight with an apple, they have hard-hitting punch lines.
19. That apple sure knows how to keep things fresh!
20. What did the apple say to the almond? You’re nuts!
21. That apple is so dramatic, it should be in a soap opera.
22. My apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, it just rolls away.
23. An apple a day keeps everyone away if thrown hard enough!
24. I’m apple-y in love with fruit puns!
25. The apple didn’t stop rolling because it didn’t want to be a square fruit.
26. The apple didn’t go to college because it didn’t want to core-centrate.
27. Why is the apple always calm? Because it never loses its peel!
28. I tried to share my apple, but it didn’t want to be a part of the pear.
29. An apple a day can’t keep the math teacher away if you have an apple pi.
30. Why don’t apples ever get lost? They always take the same root.
31. That apple just quit his job – he said he’s done with the daily grind.
32. Apple’s favorite exercise? The core workout!
33. My apple went bad today, it must’ve fallen in with the wrong bunch.
34. When life gives you apples, make juice and let the world wonder how you did it.
35. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.
36. The apple didn’t want to go to school today, it said the teacher was too seedy.
Best Apple Puns
37. Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road?
-Because it ran out of juice!
38. What did one apple skin say to the other?
– I’ve got you covered!
39. Why don’t apples ever get lost?
-Because they always have a map(le)!
40. Why did the apple go to the party?
-Because it heard the fruit punch was legendary!
41. What do you call an apple that plays the trumpet?
– A tooty fruity!
42. Why did the apple break up with the banana?
– Because it found her un-peel-ing.
43. What do you get when you cross an apple with a Christmas tree?
– A pineapple!
44. How does an apple apologize? It pleads: “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to turn over a new leaf.
45. Why was the apple sitting on top of the hill?
– Because it wanted to be a little “peel-y” mountain!
46. Why don’t apples ever go to school?
– Because they don’t want to get picked on!
47. Why did the apple stop rolling down the hill?
– It got tired of being a “roll” model!
48. How do you make an apple turnover?
-Push it down the hill!
49. What do you call a cat that eats a lot of apples?
– A purrrple!
50. Why did the apple join the circus?
-It had a knack for juggling!
51. Why did the apple pie go to a therapist?
– Because it had too many layers of emotional filling!
52. Why did the apple never get lost?
Because even when it went astray, it always remembered its roots!
53. What do you call an apple who became a lawyer?
An apple-litigator. He really knows how to get to the core of the issue!
54. Why was the apple always working out?
It wanted to be a hard-core fruit, but no matter how much it exercised, it was always a little apple-round!
55. Why did the apple get a job at the bakery?
Because it kneaded the dough. But it quickly became the apple of the baker’s pie!
56. Why was the apple always invited to fruit parties?
It was great at breaking the ice, but it always ended up in the punch!
57. Why didn’t the two apples end their feud?
Because they both had a chip on their shoulder. They just couldn’t see eye to eye, core to core.
58. What did the green apple say to the red apple?
“Look at my new peel!” The red apple responded, “I’m a-peeling too, you know!”
59.Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road?
Because it ran out of juice!
60. Why did the apple keep checking its watch?
It didn’t want to be late for its date with the orange at the fruit salad party!
61. Why did the apple stop performing at the fruit talent show?
It was tired of being a part of the “a-peel-ing” act!
62. Why was the apple such a great detective?
It always knew how to get to the core of the problem!
63. Why did the apple join the baseball team?
Because it knew the way to the pitcher’s mound, plus it had a great arm for throwing!
64. Why did the apple always carry an umbrella?
Because it didn’t want to get caught in the rain and become a “soggy apple!
65. What did the apple say to the banana at the fruit gym?
“You’re peeling quite strong today!”
66. Why was the apple always so cool at school?
Because it was the teacher’s pet, the apple of her eye!
67. Why did the apple cross the playground?
To get to the other slide. It was tired of hanging out on the swings all day!
68. Why did the apple break up with the peach?
Because it was tired of living in the peach’s shadow. It wanted to be the star fruit for a change!
69. Why did the apple apply for the job at the juice factory?
It wanted to feel a little more “squeezed” in life!
70. Why did the apple visit the eye doctor?
Because it wanted to improve its “apple-sight!”
Funniest Apple Jokes
71. Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road? It saw the zebra crossing and thought it was a bar code!
72. What’s an apple’s favorite movie? “Gone with the Peel.” It always cries at the end, no matter how many times it watches it.
73. Why did the apple become a banker? Because it was good at keeping the “core-porate” accounts balanced.
74. Why did the apple enroll in art school? It wanted to perfect its still life painting, but it just kept ending up in fruit bowls!
75. What did the apple say to the banana at the fruit dance party? “Stop peeling around and let’s do the tango!”
76. Why did the apple cross the ocean? It wanted to see the world but ended up in a fruit salad in Hawaii!
77. Why did the apple join the music band? Because it had a natural talent for playing the “pomme-granate.”
78. Why was the apple such a good musician? It always hit the “core-d” right.
79. Why did the apple break its New Year’s resolution? It got tempted by the “apple pie” in the fridge!
80. Why did the apple stop rolling down the hill? It was trying to be a good “role” model for the little grapes!
81. Why did the apple keep losing at poker? It couldn’t keep a poker face when it got a good hand and turned red!
82. Why was the apple always getting in trouble in class? It wouldn’t stop “a-peel-ing” to the teacher’s sense of humor!
83. Why did the apple visit the psychiatrist? It couldn’t get to the core of its problems!
84. What did the apple say to the lemon at the fruit reunion? “Long time no ‘c’, vitamin C!”
85. Why did the apple sign up for the cooking class? It said, “I’m tired of ending up as apple pie; I want to learn other recipes!”
86. Why did the apple stop talking to the banana? The banana split without saying goodbye.
87. Why was the apple always first in its class? It knew how to stay on top of the core curriculum.
88. Why did the apple start its own business? It wanted to get to the core of the market.
89. Why did the apple become a politician? It believed in grassroots campaigning and always went back to its roots.
90. What did the apple say when it got stuck in the tree? “I need a little help here, I’m in a real jam!”
91. Why was the apple such a good writer? It knew how to get to the core of the story!
92. Why did the apple go to the art exhibition? It had a great eye for the fine “apple-ication” of color!
93. Why was the apple such a good teacher? It knew how to bring out the best in its “pupils!”
Conclusion
And with that, we conclude our delightful adventure through the realm of apple jokes! We’ve shared laughter, savored the puns, and enjoyed the lightheartedness they bring. Let these jokes be a reminder to find joy in the simplest of things and embrace the playful side of life.