78 Most Funny Candles Jokes

This is our collection of lighthearted humor centered around our everyday luminous friends, the candles. These jokes are designed to add a spark of laughter to your day and to shine a playful light on our often overlooked waxen companions.

So get ready to glow with laughter as you dive into these fiery candle-themed puns and jokes. Enjoy!

Candles One-Liner Jokes

1. I asked my candle for an idea, it said, “Let’s shed some light on it.

2. Why did the candle never commit a crime? It was always in the spotlight!

3. I told my candle to go on a diet, it has too much wax!

4. You can always trust a candle, they’re really good at coming clean.

5. My candle’s into fitness. Its favorite exercise? The burn out

6. Asked my candle why it’s so good at poker – it always keeps a poker face.

7. Candle to the sun: “You might be brighter, but I burn longer!”

8. My candle keeps talking about fitness, it wants to burn more calories.

9. My candle has been working night shifts – it’s burning the midnight oil.

10. I knew my candle was a gossip, it keeps blowing secrets!

11. My candle always says, “I’m hot stuff!”

12. My candle wants to go camping, it loves toasting marshmallows.

Candle Joke

13. Candle’s favorite band? The Rolling Sconces!

14. The candle applied to drama school, it wants to be in the limelight.

15. My candle never gets lost, it always follows the light.

16. Told my candle to behave, but it has a fiery temper.

17. My candle refuses to work out, it says it burns enough at work!

18. My candle’s a hopeless romantic – it loves candle-lit dinners.

19. Candle to the match: “You really know how to spark my interest!”

20. My candle must be a night owl, it only ever wakes up when the sun sets.

21. Candles never play hide and seek, they’re too easy to light up!

22. My candle got a job at a bakery, now it’s a bun-dle of joy.

23. Why don’t candles go to heaven? They always burn in hell!

24. A candle’s life isn’t easy, it’s always burning out.

Best Candles Puns

25. Why don’t candles ever go to college?
Because they always burn out before they graduate!

26. What did one candle say to the other?
“Don’t birthdays burn you up?”

27. Why did the candle go to therapy?
It had a meltdown.

28. Why couldn’t the candle find its way home?
It lost its wick.

29. What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light.

30. Why are candles so good at meditation?
Because they are always in the present, they’re really good at “burning” through their issues!

31. What do candles and runners have in common?
They both like to burn some calories.

32. What did the shy candle say to the light bulb?
“You always know how to brighten up my day.”

33. What did the candle say to the matches?
You light my fire!

Candle Joke

34. Why did the candle go to the party?
Because it wanted to wax poetic.

35. How do you tell the difference between a candle and a musician?
Only one can blow itself out.

36. Why did the candle get in trouble at school?
It had a short fuse.

37. What do you call a nervous candle?
A flicker!

38. Why do candles never play hide and seek?
Because they always get lit up when they’re excited.

39. Why did the candle never get any sleep?
It was always burning the midnight oil.

40. Why did the candle flunk out of school?
Because it wasn’t too bright.

41. What do you call a candle’s school report card?
A light read!

42. Why did the candle join the circus?
It wanted to join the fire-eating act.

43. Why did the candle stay home from the concert?
It didn’t want to get burned out.

44. Why did the candle go to the doctor?
It was feeling a little light-headed!

45. Why was the candle always in trouble?
Because it was always burning bridges!

46. How do you invite a candle to your party?
“Come on over, we’re going to have a blast!”

47. Why was the candle so romantic?
Because it always went out in the evening!

48. What’s a candle’s favorite type of joke?
A burn, of course!

49. Why did the candle lose its job?
It just couldn’t hold a flame to its predecessor.

50. Why did the candle stay at home all day?
It didn’t want to melt away in the sun.

Funniest Candles Jokes

51. Why was the candle always stressed?
It was constantly burning at both ends!

52. How do candles say goodbye?
“Burn out, not fade away!”

53. What do candles and procrastinators have in common?
They both tend to burn time.

54. What is a candle’s favorite type of candy?
Wax Worms!

55. Why did the candle refuse to go out?
It didn’t want to be extinguished.

56. Why did the candle go broke?
Because it always burned through its money!

57. Why did the candle lose the race?
It ran out of wick!

58. Why don’t candles ever tell secrets?
Because they’re afraid they might get blown out!

59. Why do candles make terrible journalists?
They always burn their sources!

60. How do candles communicate?
They speak in light language!

Candle Joke

61. What did the candle say to the moth?
“I’m just not that into you!”

62. What do candles wear to weddings?
Wicks and tuxedos.

63. Why was the candle such a bad cook?
It always burnt dinner!

64. Why did the candle keep losing at poker?
It kept showing its poker face – all lit up!

65. Why didn’t the candle get hired?
It always burnt out too quickly.

66. What did the candle say when it got angry?
“I’m really burning up now!”

67. How do you know when a candle is an extrovert?
It lights up the room!

68. Why don’t candles make good detectives?
They always jump to con-clusions!

69. Why did the candle sit in the corner?
It wanted to get its corners just right.

70. How do candles get ready for a date?
They wax and polish!

71. What does a candle do when it gets lost?
It waxes and wanes!

72. Why do candles never work out in relationships?
They always get burned!

73. Why did the candle never find love?
Because everyone it liked was too bright.

74. Why did the candle go to the beach?
To have some fun in the sun and get a little melted!

75. Why did the candle get kicked out of school?
It had a glowing record of misconduct!

76. Why did the candle visit the psychiatrist?
It couldn’t handle the pressure and had a melt-down!

77. Why don’t candles make good comedians?
They always crack under the heat of the spotlight!

78. What’s a candle’s favorite movie?
“Gone with the Wick!”


And that brings us to the end of our illuminating journey through candle-themed humor. It’s been a bright, pun-filled ride and we hope it’s sparked joy and lit up your day with laughter. Until next time, keep that laughter burning and remember, there’s always a light side to every situation!


Leave a Comment