56 Most Funniest Grapes Jokes

Step into the delightful vineyard of humor with these grape-themed jokes. From their juicy lives to their ambitions of not becoming a raisin, these grapes have a lot to say.

So get ready to squeeze out a chuckle, because these puns are sure to make you feel ‘grape’!

Grapes One-Liner Jokes

1. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice!

2. Why don’t grapes ever get lonely? Because they come in bunches!

3. Why did the grape go to the party? To have a vine time!

4. How do you make a grape laugh? Tell a raisin-able joke!

5. What did the grape say when it was crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

6. Why did the grape go on a diet? It felt a little plump!

7. Why don’t grapes tell secrets? They tend to wine too much!

8. What do you call a frozen grape? A chilling vine blizzard!

9. Why did the grape refuse to fight the lemon? Because it didn’t want any sour grapes!

10. Why don’t grapes like pressure? They might end up as a bottle of wine!

Grapes Joke about wine

11. Why did the grape join a band? It had the jam!

12. Why was the grape annoyed at the prune? Because it saw its future and it was dried up!

13. What do you call a grape that’s a comedian? A vine humorist!

14. How do you organize a grape party? You wine and cheese it!

15. Why did the grape turn purple? Because it saw the salad dressing!

16. What do you call a grape that can draw? Vincent van Grape!

17. What’s a grape’s favorite type of news? The vine times!

18. Why don’t grapes ever get lost? Because they always vine their way!

19. What did the green grape say to the purple grape? “Breathe, man, breathe!”

20. Why don’t grapes make good secret agents? Because they’re easy to squeeze!

Best Grapes Puns

21. Why was the grape feeling blue?
It was stuck at the bottom of the fruit salad, with no one to ketchup to!

22. Why do grapes never shout at each other?
Because good communication is key to a healthy bunch!

23. What did the grape say when it saw itself in the mirror?
“Look at that grape body, I’m not just another pretty fruit!”

24. Why did the grape go to school?
It had a thirst for knowledge and wanted to be on the grapevine of information!

25. What do grapes say when they introduce themselves?
“I heard it through the grapevine that we hadn’t met yet!”

26. What did the grape say when it got stepped on?
“That’s not the kind of ‘press’ I wanted!”

27. Why did the grape fail its driving test?
It took a turn too quickly and ended up in a jam!

28. Why don’t grapes like to play hide and seek?
They always turn into a raisin when they’re hiding for too long!

29. How does a grape apologize?
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to give you a sour grape experience!”

30. What do you call a grape who’s an artist?
Grape Picasso, the master of fruit expressionism!

Grapes joke

31. Why did the grape become a philosopher?
It wanted to understand the raisin behind its existence!

32. Why did the grape get stuck in the elevator?
It had pressed the wrong button and ended up in a real jam!

33. What did the grape do when it got a flat tire?
It let out a little whine and called for help on the grapevine!

34. Why don’t grapes ever tell a secret in a vineyard?
Because the potatoes have eyes, the corn has ears and the beans stalk!

35. Why did the grape go to the disco?
It heard the music was poppin’, just like it!

36. Why did the grape go to the casino?
It was feeling lucky and ready to hit the jackpot, or else it would be raisin a fuss!

Most Funny Grapes Jokes

37. Why did the grape get into politics?
It heard it was a great way to get into the grapevine of power!

38. What do you call a grape that loves to read?
A grape philosopher!

39. Why did the grape bring a sun hat to the beach?
It didn’t want to become a raisin!

40. How do grapes keep their clothes wrinkle-free?
They always use the vine-gar!

41. Why do grapes never get tired of school?
They’re always raisin their grades!

42. What do you call a grape who plays chess?
A grape strategist!

43. Why did the grape join the gym?
It was tired of feeling squeezed!

44. Why did the grape go to Hollywood?
It wanted to star in a fruit feature film!

45. Why don’t grapes ever get stuck in traffic?
They always find a way to squeeze through!

46. Why was the grape always relaxed?
It knew how to go with the flow, especially in the juice press!

47. What do you call a grape that loves extreme sports?
An adrenaline junkie-fruit!

48. Why was the grape proud at the fruit meeting?
It was selected as the grape-est of them all!

juicy grapes joke

49. How do grapes make friends?
They blend well and keep things sweet!

50. Why did the grape refuse to play cards with the jungle cat?
It was afraid of cheetahs!

51. Why did the grape never miss a workout?
It knew the importance of keeping its peel in shape!

52. Why was the grape worried about its future?
It had heard about the sour times!

53. Why did the grape join the theater?
It loved the spotlight and wanted to be in the limelight!

54. Why was the grape always invited to parties?
It knew how to keep things juicy!

55. Why did the grape always carry an umbrella?
It was scared of the raisin’ rain!

56. How do grapes stay informed?
They always stay tuned to the grapevine news!


We hope these juicy grape jokes have brought a smile to your face. From vineyards to grape philosophers, our grape friends truly know how to live a pun-filled life.

Remember, life is always a little sweeter when you can find a raisin to laugh at!


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