68 Most Funny Whale Jokes

Get ready for a fun adventure with jokes about whales that’ll make you laugh out loud! We’ve picked some of the best one-liners about these giant sea creatures to share with you. So, sit back, relax, and let these funny jokes bring a big smile to your face.

Whale One-Liner Jokes

1. Whales always sing in the shower; it’s their built-in sound system.

2. A whale’s favorite greeting? Long time, no sea!

3. Why don’t whales use phones? Too much water damage.

4. Whales don’t use GPS; they believe in starfish navigation.

5. A whale’s least favorite place? A dry dock.

6. Why are whales so wise? They have deep thoughts.

7. Whales don’t like fast food; they can’t catch it.

8. A whale’s favorite exercise? The belly flop.

9. Why don’t whales play chess? The board always floats away.

10. Whales are always in fashion; they really know how to make a splash.

Whale Joke

11. A whale’s favorite game? Swallow the leader.

12. Why do whales love the moon? It controls their night life.

13. Whales don’t bake; they can’t stand the heat.

14. A whale’s dream job? An anchor at Sea-NN.

15. Why don’t whales use combs? They can’t handle the tangles.

16. Whales don’t like secrets; they always surface.

17. A whale’s favorite snack? Krill crackers.

18. Why are whales bad liars? Too easy to see right through them.

19. Whales don’t jog; they think it’s a shore thing.

20. A whale’s life motto? “Just keep swimming… and singing.”

Best Whale Puns

21. Why do whales always know where to go?
Because they use Whale Waze.

22. What’s a whale’s favorite magazine?
National Geogra-fish.

23. Why was the baby whale sad?
Because it missed its mummy whale.

24. How do whales like their water?
Just a fin above room temperature.

25. What do you call a whale who’s a spy?
A double-o blubber agent.

26. Why did the whale go to the bar?
To get a little krill-er on the dance floor.

27. What kind of cars do whales drive?
SUVs – Submersible Underwater Vehicles.

28. Why do whales make terrible lawyers?
They can’t handle dry cases.

29. What’s a whale’s favorite place to chill?
The Arctic pool.

30. How do you apologize to a whale?
You whale it with kindness.

Whale Joke

31. What did the whale say after a big meal?
“I’m whale-stuffed!”

32. Why don’t whales like fast food?
It makes them feel like a bloated float.

33. How do whales do their laundry?
In the tide.

34. What’s a whale’s favorite social event?
A splash party.

35. Why did the whale cross the road?
To get to the other tide… and because it was a pedestrian whalewalk.

36. What do whales read to their children at night?
Moby Duck.

37. How do whales keep their skin looking good?
They moisturize with ocean lotion.

38. What’s a whale’s favorite kind of story?
A tail of adventure.

39. Why don’t whales ever get into fights?
Because they whale-y don’t see the porpoise.

40. What did one whale say to the other before a race?
“May the best fin win!”

Funniest Whale Jokes

41. What do you call a whale who loves to gamble?
A high roller in the deep sea.

42. How do whales greet each other?
With a big “Whale, hello there!”

43. Why did the whale join the orchestra?
Because it had a great bass-tuba voice.

44. What’s a whale’s favorite dance move?
The tail spin.

45. How do whales like their news?
On the current events.

46. What’s a whale’s favorite nursery rhyme? “Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream.
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream.”

47. Why was the whale so good at algebra?
He loved to play with pi-sh.

48. What do you call a whale who’s an artist?
A brushstroke in the ocean.

49. How do you know if a whale is rich?
When it has a lot of sand dollars in the bank.

50. What’s a whale’s least favorite day of the week?
Blubber Monday.

51. Why do whales never get lost at sea?
They always whale-path their way home.

52. What’s a whale’s favorite kind of story?
A fish tale.

53. How do whales stay informed?
By watching the current affairs.

54. What do you call a whale with a fast internet connection?

55. Why did the whale go to yoga?
To improve its flexibility and find its inner porpoise.

Whale Joke

56. What do you call a group of whales who live together?
A pod-ment complex.

57. Why don’t whales like to play cards under water?
Because they’re afraid of the shark cards.

58. What’s a whale’s favorite hobby?
Blowing bubbles.

59. Why did the whale refuse to fight?
It didn’t want to blow things out of proportion.

60. What do you call a whale who can’t make up its mind?
A maybe-whale.

61. Why don’t whales get married?
Because they believe in krill-ationships, not anchor-age.

62. What do whales use for online dating?
Plenty of Fish.

63. Why was the whale considered a genius in the ocean?
Because it had a killer whale IQ.

64. What did the whale say at the fancy restaurant?
“I’ll have the plankton, on the sea bed.”

65. How do whales do their taxes?
They claim the ocean as their home office.

66. Why was the whale a successful real estate agent?
Because it was great at flipping beach properties.

67. What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
“Licence to Krill.”

68. Why don’t whales like fast food?
Because they can’t catch the fries swimming by.


Hope you had a good laugh with our whale jokes! Just like the big, friendly whales, these jokes were here to bring some fun into your day. Thanks for joining us on this funny journey. Keep smiling and sharing the laughter!


Leave a Comment